THIS is the energy I want in 2022.
And if I’ve learned one thing from Hailey Whitters this year, it’s that nothing comes between a Midwest girl and her corn.
I mean, the girl loves her some corn, and you’ll often see it featured on a lot of her stage clothes, jewelry, album cover, and even as apart of her stage props… take the iconic corn skirt, for example:
And the Iowa native even has these incredible, human-sized cutouts of corn cobs she displays at her shows as part of the set design, mostly to bring that Midwest feel all over the country at any given show, I assume.
But at a hometown show over the weekend, somebody took it too far and actually stole one of them. First of all, I have a lot of questions… because as you’ll see in the video below, the room is packed full of people, and the corn cob is huge, so how did no one stop this person before she even made it out the door?
Anyways, Hailey was pretty sad about it, and posted some details about the saga on her Instagram stories. And if there’s one thing about small towns all over the country, it’s that everybody knows everybody and people talk.
So naturally, Hailey and some of those boys back home figured out who took it pretty quickly, and knew exactly where to find the missing cob. They pulled up in a truck, plucked the cutout from the front stoop (terrible place to leave it if you were really planning on keeping it), and safely returned it to Hailey without a scratch.
She captured the whole ordeal in the video below, and I’m here for the whole thing.
I imagine this is the southern girls equivalent to someone stealing a cutout of a bowl of banana pudding or something, and I’d do everything in my power to get that back, too.
Ladies, this is the energy we need to keep for the second half of the year… do not let anybody steal your metaphorical corncob, and if they do, you go and get that shit back:
“Small town saga of the stolen corn cob….”
And while you’re here, check out “Boys Back Home” from Hailey’s recent studio album, Raised: